What can we allow in?

Between the trees at sunrise

What can we allow in the open space that we are?

What must we discard?

What can’t we bear to feel?

What do we want to push away–

because it hurts too much,

or because it doesn’t fit in with

who we think we are?

I am noticing all the ways I do not

let the world in fully.

I want to let it all in.

All of it.

Every perceived slight, hurt, niggling embarrassed feeling.

Every indignant rush, every perceived weakness,

every inner and outer scorn.

I am tired of only fully allowing that which

feels good or looks positive.

I want to let in the beggars of myself,

the inner parts dressed in rags.

If we allow in the whole world,

who can we reject?

 

 

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13 thoughts on “What can we allow in?

  1. Wonderful, Kathy. Come live in Ohio prior to a big election. I’m kidding, in a way, but I have been letting in those parts of the world/election I normally don’t agree with by putting aside anger or fear or scorn and practicing metta/lovingkindness. May all beings be happy and free. What amazes me is that it’s helped me to listen better, to be more open to other views, to wonder in a good way.

    • Robin, I’ve been letting these in as well~~or trying to. Have been reading Jeff Foster’s newest book called The Deepest Acceptance and am truly loving it.

  2. Loved the poem Kath!

    As OM pointed out in a previous post. It is ALL already let in even the fact that something doesn’t want to let it all in. Even that is let in. By the time it is happening and\or noticed, it is already occurring. Hilarious… but maybe not at first.

    We all get our share of humanness. and that is no problem… and yet something might think it is a problem.

    I call it the split. The split is the idea we have been taught and assumed that we are separate. By all appearances it appears to be true. Separate physical bodies having unique thoughts and sensations. Is it really so?

    What I missed for so long is I am not separate. I am not a separate I. Something undefinable is here. Some call it awareness, consciousness, this, etc… All arises in it even the humanness that wants to push some things away. No choice. No escape. Still comes up. Can’t separate from it even if it appears like we should work at it, fix it, or it shouldn’t be happening. It still happens and it is noticed afterwards. Can’t notice it before.

    What a relief. This isn’t about me. Sure the body and thoughts are conditioned to think and feel certain things. So what? Who or what cares?

    So, just seeing the split as it happens helps to see through it. Who can do that? It just happens to occur one day the opportunity or invitation to see that there doesn’t need to be a personal split no matter how ugly or unwanted “what is” seems to be.

    Lately, a fun experiment, was to take any and all criticisms regardless of whether or not I agreed with them. I received some whoppers. In some cases, they were true tendencies of this body mind.

    Yep! You’re right. There it is.

    In the cases, I didn’t agree with them, I just said, you know what? I can take your criticism or your analysis and be perfectly fine with you having it even though I don’t necessarily agree with it.

    Guess what happens. It totally loses it’s power. Maybe not right away, but in the pure experiencing of the resistance, anger, etc… it tails off, and I have had to laugh (some times at myself) at how inconsequential it ends up being. It resolves itself just noticing that is here already. Even the stuff that really pisses me off loses it’s power.

    Some might interpret Jesus’ saying turn the other cheek as a moral imperative. Experientially, I see that the apparent injustice falls away when full met. Go ahead! Lay me out and my character flaws. Then, what I noticed is I start noticing them like neon signs as they arise, and I get aggravated. By the time I notice, it is already here, and starts to get kind of funny… but not at first.

    So, I am free, fully human and also more thanI can’t describe. Maddening and funny seeing it.

    Might as well.
    It is already here.

    Ramana Maharshi was quoted as saying these tendencies (tapas I think) start to slow down and just pure recognition, pure experiencing without the experiencer remains minus the splitting of the person having the experience. Doesn’t happen all the time though because we have this humanness. Does lose its edge. If Ramana said it, he was right… as far as I am concerned.

    Great Post!
    Thank you!
    Ben

    • I am glad you enjoyed this, Ben. It’s always good to read what you share. Have you read Jeff Foster’s new book “The Deepest Acceptance”? He expresses so much of what you said here. Thank you so much!

  3. Hi Kath,

    No I haven’t read Jeff’s book. I am glad you point it out because I am now interested.

    In terms of what I am writing, it is all coming from direct experience. My conditioning and filters are in my face like neon signs. I am getting big lessons on my conditioned assumptions and human behavioral tendencies.

    At work, my ability to control my work load is failing. I see my filters are flawed in my decision making process. At the end of the day, I am so mentally toasted due to all the work and analytics I don’t feel like reading.

    My parents are now elderly. They both have serious health issues, and I am having to get more and more involved. I am an only child so it is up to me, and I am showing up for service. It is also challenging and I am getting a square in the face view of life as it is as well as my human limitations.

    All this equates to a lot of failure on what my humanness has “believed” and the patterns of my behavior hence the neon sign aspect. It is all simply awesome
    in its difficulty.

    I am getting daily instruction on how everything is mirroring my humaness and it is instructing me to see through it. I could fight it, deny it, rationalize it, suppress it and intellectualize it and I have seen the tendency of thought to try. I see how it fails to capture the mystery of life both seen and unseen.

    Your poem is in my face right now in terms of ground level reality. You are such a wonderfully practical and lovely mirror. Your writing and the urge to respond is helping provide clarity where I might otherwise miss it. While someone might think these discussions and writings are esoteric, I see them as the way it really is. It is all providing tremendous clarity in the flames of the temporary pointing directly to what is unchanging, true, and an exquisite mystery.

    Thank you so much!
    Ben

  4. I know what you mean, Ben, about the conditioning and filters being in awareness like neon signs. Oh yes… It IS simply awesome in its difficulty, like you said. I am glad to help provide clarity. I don’t see these discussions as esoteric. I think sometimes, with some people, we are able to see through the maze of words and really “know” about penetrating to the reality of what exists beneath all the waves in the ocean. The ocean itself. Blessings, my friend.

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