When you’re feeling blue

The winter of ourselves

The winter of ourselves

Sometimes when we’re blue and shackled and not-knowing-what-to-do-next the Universe can manifest the next right person who lights our way, who provides a flashlight onto our path, who confirms our right to exist with so-and-so opinion.

OK, I admit, the Universe also sends us that irritating person who destroys our confidence, who takes away our voice, who confuses us with his righteous tone as he tells us what we’re supposed to do next.  (Especially when our inner voice points in a direction that feels more right.)

I don’t have any answers.

Like you, I bloom at this place here-now and witness Life sharing its tidbits, both wanted and unwanted.

I share my questions and temporary answers, unbidden, in many spaces.

Like you, I sing the notes of Oneness and separateness.  I won’t take the high-and-mighty path, except when I do.  I don’t even believe in “me”, except when I do.

I don’t claim enlightenment–or even wanting it–except maybe last Saturday.

Today, when I was feeling blue, a friend wrote with words of support. When I couldn’t see the larger picture because of stinging wasps of opinions, she etched it with brilliant colors.  She said, “You provide a space where people can find their voice.  This is no small thing.”

Like those who struggle to find their voice, I find and lose mine a hundred times a day.

I don’t like those who pretend they know, except sometimes when it seems delightful to exist in a multi-faceted diamond hologram of opinions.

Sometimes I want to quit blogging because of the weight of other’s insistence.

Other times those opinions seem so logically a shining part of the Oneness that I beg, “More, more, more!”

Some people try to banish their blue hues with positive thinking. Sometimes, so do I.  Yet, more and more, I sit patiently with the blues, allowing them to exist, allowing them to shine their unwanted color into the rainbow of what-I-am.  (Which, sometimes, is everything, even you.)

Don’t try to tell me how or what to be next.

Like you, the Mystery flows through like a river, illuminating this and that, sorrow and delight, the Holy Grail of its unfolding.


17 thoughts on “When you’re feeling blue

  1. “Don’t try to tell me how or what to be next.” This has been my life’s mantra Kathy. It has taken me a whole lifetime to finally to arrive at a place where I have the strength to ever so gently stand up for myself and live my life my way, so who am I to ever judge a living soul? I can’t do it, even if I wanted to, which I don’t. I love the Kathy that I have come to know, don’t ever change for anyone. We will always have our good and bad days, we wouldn’t be human otherwise. xx

    • Joanne, thank you. It’s so easy for me to feel like I AM the other person that it’s sometimes hard to maintain any boundaries. Do you feel like that, too? I tend to believe everything I read–or someone says–next. Sometimes forgetting to consult the inner knowing. Blessings to you, my friend!

      • I absolutely do! I feel people’s pain and I used to wallow with them, until a wise person told me to empathize, not sympathize. Once I got my head around that concept I learned how to remember that I am a separate entity and I am not responsible for another persons actions, sorrows or moods. It’s a fine line you have to draw, between being supportive to those you love, whilst not loading yourself up with their emotional baggage. I’ve also worked out now that if I read something and it “gels” for me, if it feels right, I will believe it. If not, it’s forgotten. You are a blessing Kathy, thank you.

        • That is very wise advice, Joanne. Sometimes easy to walk that fine line; other times not as much. I so appreciate you, too! Blessings, my friend…

  2. This is so wise and beautiful … and “you” … in whatever form — always authentic. I’m so glad. You’re a treasure of acceptance.

    • May we always be authentic, even if it doesn’t look “wise” or “all together”. May we speak from our deepest truths, even if they look contradictory. May we allow the Universe to arise through us. Amen and Amen, Susan D!

  3. I spoke my heart! This is so true. The shut inner voice which wants to explode out.. the positive & the negative people consantly trying to pull us in several directions. You composed the thought very beautifully, Kathy. This is such a truthful experience..

    • Thank you, Sonali. I think so many of us feel this. Glad to share it with you. P.S. Have you read the book by Anita Moorjani Dying to be me? I think you might enjoy it.

  4. Great piece Kathy, and it’s a timely one. I have a choice I’m about to make that not everyone around me is going to like – and that scares me – but I have to stay connected to that knowing that I and my opinions and choices ARE worthy and have value, and while equally I respect those of others, I also invite them to respect mine…please:-) Love and hugs, Harula xxxx

    • Harula, my heart goes out to you. I love that you are following your heart despite your fears. That seems to be the way to go, even though it can be so hard at times with so many conflicting opinions and choices. (Even within us, it seems!) I know you’ll find your way. Much love, Kathy

      • Thank you Kathy:-) The first step has been taken and it wasn’t nearly as difficult as I had expected! I did remember to ask for help, on the inner, so I’m sure that helped. Blessings on your week, love and gratitude – Harula xxxx

  5. Am I blue? you’d be too, if your plans fell through, says the lines of a song. As you and I have been discussing, in some manner or other. Being in the moment blue or Sun shining it is where we are.
    Yes the universe will send us what we need and we can use it if and when we get out of our own way…
    Speaking of losing your voice, I have been wondering where mine went again?

    You have captured the essence of each of us, the Multifaceted beings that we are. Allow ourselves to Be…

    • Yes, that’s true, Jeff. Getting out of our own way can be the most challenging. and learning how to embrace our deepest self–while not shutting down–can be the work of a lifetime. I think. 🙂 Always wanting to express our multi-facetedness. You do it so well, my friend.

    • Thanks, Lori. I’ve felt a bit lost a couple times lately with no idea whether to turn left or right. Not on any big things–just generally. Thanks for liking the songs no matter if they’re the blues or upbeat jazz.

  6. Loved this part. I feel the same way too…

    “Some people try to banish their blue hues with positive thinking. Sometimes, so do I. Yet, more and more, I sit patiently with the blues, allowing them to exist, allowing them to shine their unwanted color into the rainbow of what-I-am. (Which, sometimes, is everything, even you.)”

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