Diamond of who we are

Who we are

Who we are

It’s possible for Life to lead a mining expedition into the heart of ourselves.  We travel deep, deep, deep into the caverns of our interiors to discover what we truly are.  At the base, at the very apex of ourselves, we may realize our essence.  Then we climb back out of the cave into the light of day to walk as what’s been revealed.

What exists at our apex, that which is both the deepest and the highest?  (And, some might smile and add: it’s completely available at our shallowest and lowest, as well.)  Peace.  Well-being.  Love.  Joy.  Completeness.  Fullness.  Enough-ness. Diversity and Oneness co-existing in a single dance.

Everything for which we’ve been searching our entire life (and that includes the happiness which seems to result from a chocolate chip cookie) shines within us.  Always.  It’s never left. Never dearly departed.  Always the light which shines in any seeming darkness of any shadowed moment.  It’s with us in tears.  With us in death.  With us eternally, endlessly, ever-present.

But is the journey over when one discovers the peace, the light?  For some rare birds, perhaps it is.  Life illuminates itself, and the person Knows.  The force of the dynamite explosion destroys the ego-self and reveals the diamond within.  (Think of Eckhart Tolle and Byron Katie and their deep dark repressed energy which apparently provided enough fuel to blow their former worlds to smithereens.)

Those of us without dynamite still might discover the diamond of ourselves, but parts of the personality might remain intact. (By personality, I mean the both the image of self and the ego-apparatus of desire and aversion which fuels us humans and keeps us securely in our character roles.)

Both the quest into the mountain and the walk back into one’s life often involves the same clearing and polishing motion. The diamond is obscured by dirt and rough surfaces.  The One has also been hidden by ego-self.  So the polishing involves bringing trapped or unconscious energy to the air and releasing it.  Don Juan, in Carlos Castaneda books calls this “recapitulation”.  He utilized a breathing/remembering technique to release the energy which binds the small self.  Hundreds of other techniques abound, as spiritual adepts describe what has worked best for them.

What is the separate self except energy compressed by beliefs?  We humans are bundles of tight beliefs, spinning ourselves into existence with every breath.  If the beliefs are penetrated, they might reveal themselves to be untrue, empty, not in alignment with the diamond at the depth.

So our journey both into and out of the mountain involves utilizing awareness to see through the imaginary character Life has so painstakingly created and cultivated. It’s also revealed that Life itself is the one seeing through its own patterns, the divine polisher of its own diamond!

So does it all “end” when one discovers what one truly is?  So many miners say no.  It’s just a beginning.  So many patterns and beliefs and desires and fears still beg to be seen, to be penetrated, to be revealed as shams, as charlatans, as something other than peace and joy.  Every day brings a new opportunity to see through.

This “seeing through” can be revealed instantly, but often takes multiple seeings.  The self/ego wants to remain unseen.  It utilizes cunning means and tricks to keep itself intact.  It uses the fuel of desires and fears to further cement itself. Any time we react to cravings and contractions without awareness we continue the belief that there is an “I” who desires or fears.

“Seeing through” often involves a combination of body, mind and spirit. It is an effortless noticing, not an egoistic effort-full doing creating more karma. (In fact, when the doing comes from ego/self, it’s usually simply another desire/belief which reveals itself to be simply more suffering.)  It includes sitting with raw physical/emotional sensations without our ego story, as well as allowing insight to penetrate the pattern.  One truly must eventually see that the belief or pattern is NOT who one is.  When that is deeply known, the pattern releases itself.

The dirt around the diamond falls away.

What exists–always, evermore–shines brighter than one could ever imagine.

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3 thoughts on “Diamond of who we are

  1. I will come back and finish reading. I stopped after the words small self. For me this means i decide what part of me i do not like and i put it down and i call it small. I think that I am all that I am and all that I am not and all of the points in between in all moments, even if I am not noticing them all, or walking beside them all.

    • I can see how it’s possible to call the small self the inferior self. I have done that at times, too. However, in this instance I meant the small self is the view of self that doesn’t include the entire Universe. That’s what it feels like to me. Like one view thinks it’s separate quite often, a person in a body. The larger self includes everything that is. That was the distinction I was trying to make.

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